Monday 6th September
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An open letter to spammers
Written on 3 Sep, 2010 by Jenny the bloggess
Dear guy-that-keeps-sending-me-multiple-viagra-emails-every-single-day-of-my-life: Yes. I know that I’ve continued to shut you down by ignoring you, installing a spam filter, asking to be taken off your list and informing you that my name is actually not “Mr. Jenny the Bloggess” but... (Continue reading)
People in the country need xanax too.
Written on 1 Sep, 2010 by Jenny the bloggess
Okay, so first of all my kidney infection was doing much better until last night when I seriously considered removing my left kidney myself because it hurt so much but it’s behind me and I’m not that flexible so then... (Continue reading)
I missed Victor and I’m ready for him to leave again.
Written on 30 Aug, 2010 by Jenny the bloggess
Victor’s home (yay!) and he leaves again tonight (mother.fucker.) but it was nice because when he got home from his work retreat he was all “I’m exhausted. Can you rub my temples?” and I was like “Um…I have piratitis” and... (Continue reading)
I seem to have disturbed some kind of Indian graveyard
Written on 29 Aug, 2010 by Jenny the bloggess
No Sunday wrap-up today. I have an acute kidney infection and Victor is still out of town so I’m letting Hailey be in charge of the house until he gets back. Nothing’s on fire yet and she made me lunch... (Continue reading)
Surprisingly, I don’t really know how meth works on your genitals. Please stop asking me.
Written on 26 Aug, 2010 by Jenny the bloggess
Today I wrote a post on my sex column about all the really horrific google searches that bring people to my blog (but that I didn’t want to write about here because that’s just going to result in even more... (Continue reading)
Oh. That was…unexpected.
Written on 25 Aug, 2010 by Jenny the bloggess
You know what’s awesome? When you’re having a crappy day and the doorbell rings and there’s a guy with a package that you need to sign for and you smile excitedly at him and you’re all “Awesome! I love getting... (Continue reading)
You would see the biggest gift would be from me and the card attached would say “Thank you for helping me dig up my dead dog”.
Written on 22 Aug, 2010 by Jenny the bloggess
Disclaimer: You shouldn’t read this. So I called a million (a million = 14) places to get someone to come disinter my dog that was already partially disinterred by the horrible vultures that I attacked with a machete but NO... (Continue reading)
It’s fairly obvious that we’re related. Also, we deal with pain through laughter in our family. Stop judging me.
Written on 21 Aug, 2010 by Jenny the bloggess
First of all, thank you to everyone for being so supportive about Barnaby Jones. You made me cry (in a good way) and I needed to do that. It’s almost Sunday and I’m supposed to be writing my weekly wrap-up... (Continue reading)
RIP, Barnaby Jones Pickles
Written on 20 Aug, 2010 by Jenny the bloggess
I didn’t want to write this but it feels wrong not to since I share so much of my life here. This isn’t a funny or entertaining post and you have my full permission to skip it. Yesterday Barnaby Jones... (Continue reading)
Hostage letters from the spam folder
Written on 18 Aug, 2010 by Jenny the bloggess
Actual comment stuck in my spam filter: I’m not gonna approve it, but I am giving him points for creativity.... (Continue reading)
I stole most of these pictures
Written on 17 Aug, 2010 by Jenny the bloggess
And finally…part 4 of my Blogher experience (as lifted directly from my journal). Parts 1, 2 and 3 are here. I swear I’m almost finished, y’all. Walked to a public party at the Volstead. Hid in the bathroom, as usual.... (Continue reading)
I can’t think of a title and I need a drink
Written on 16 Aug, 2010 by Jenny the bloggess
I usually do my weekly wrap-up of shit-I-did-when-I-wasn’t-here on Sunday but I forgot because I thought yesterday was Saturday. Which was quite a rude shock when I woke up this morning, I assure you. This week on Ask the Bloggess: Cyber-bullies... (Continue reading)
Unimportant trivia: Padma was once married to the guy who wrote “The Satanic Verses” (which I always refer to as “The Vampire Diaries” because I’m bad with titles).
Written on 13 Aug, 2010 by Jenny the bloggess
Part 1 and part 2 of my Blogher summary are done. Part 3 starts now: I was asked to do a cooking competition at Blogher and I would have said no except that they said that I could create whatever... (Continue reading)
Stop being an asshole, New York
Written on 12 Aug, 2010 by Jenny the bloggess
This is part 2 of my Blogher experience as recorded in my journal and I would recommend that you read part one first so that this part would make sense but honestly I don’t think that’s going to help either... (Continue reading)
Dear New York Airport: Maybe next time you could have us land in a pit of vipers that are also on fire. Just to keep things new.
Written on 11 Aug, 2010 by Jenny the bloggess
Last week I was at the Blogher conference and it’s too complicated to write about so instead I’m just going to re-write the notes I jotted in my journal while I was there because I’m really tired and I believe... (Continue reading)
